Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Kyoka Uganda Police!
Job Collins 21 June 18:18
Uganda Police never stops to amuse, especially their intelligence outfits. Today, I was treated to another spectacular "professional" services just shortly after 1:00pm. I had started my day perfectly, had a meeting in Entebbe then rushed to attend a brief one in Lubowa, and returned to Kampala, with an intent to rush over for some "chicken and chips" in Wandegeya. Suddenly, two "serious" policemen (one in uniform, the other plain clothed) came over, stopped me and told me "We have been following you, we have 'Intelligence Report' that you have a dangerous certified information which we must have now".
The New Vision is Uganda's leading daily newspaper. {PAGE_META_DESCRIPTION}
Uganda Police never stops to amuse, especially their intelligence outfits. Today, I was treated to another spectacular "professional" services just shortly after 1:00pm. I had started my day perfectly, had a meeting in Entebbe then rushed to attend a brief one in Lubowa, and returned to Kampala, with an intent to rush over for some "chicken and chips" in Wandegeya. Suddenly, two "serious" policemen (one in uniform, the other plain clothed) came over, stopped me and told me "We have been following you, we have 'Intelligence Report' that you have a dangerous certified information which we must have now".
I looked at them, and asked... "who sent you and which intelligence report are you talking about?". Then, finding it difficult, they asked that I be taken to their postalong Kampala road for "interrogation and searching", I accepted, and we drove off to the Police Post. A man with a fat stomach sat in and I was ushered in. Two more men came in. I then told them, " you said there is intelligence report which implicates me of something, can you elaborate, because I cant accept to be interrogated over what I have no clue over. What is the reason for bringing me here"? Finding it tough, they started quarking.
The man with a huge belly, almost my size, gained courage. He picked a copy of the New Vision newspaper and showed me an article, with the heading ..."Police warns public on forged car log book" (please find the link herein above and also herein below http://www.facebook.com/l/9b8c5IHVh-2VDJW2XO4hhjalRAQ/www.newvision.co.ug/D/8/13/758148
Already feeling hungry because I was intercepted before reaching my favourite Wandegeya based restaurant, I didnt ask them further questions, I expected questions from them. Then, the plain-clothed man asked for my laptop bag for it to be searched. I gave. After searching the bag and finding nothing worthy of their 'intelligence reports", they started shaking in fear. Interestingly, they came across a document (an agreement/MoU between the organization I lead and a partner, stamped with my official stamp) and they started querrying the authenticity of the document.
I get pissed off and told them, are you supposed to be wherever I negotiate partnerships? Must you be notified everything I do and everywhere I go? Then, the men made fools of themselves, and with NOTHING else to complain of, and their "intelligence chief" seemingly in hidding due to giving FAKE reports, the policemen started asking me for some SODA, saying they are very hungry and has been working alot to trace me and other people.
Finding their request very BOGUS, I ordered them to release me immediately before I call in my Attorney and things turn bad. They Apologized and asked me to leave their office peacefully. That is actually the UGANDAN POLICE FORCE ON DUTY!
http://www.newvision.co.ug/D/8/13/758148
The New Vision is Uganda's leading daily newspaper. {PAGE_META_DESCRIPTION}
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Friday, June 17, 2011
The Pig and the Horse!
There was a farmer who collected horses; he only needed one more breed to complete his collection. One day, he found out that his neighbor had the particular horse breed he needed. So, he constantly bothered his neighbor until he sold it to him. A month later, the horse became ill and he called the veterinarian, who said: - Well, your horse has a virus. He must take this medicine for three days. I'll come back on the 3rd day and if he's not better, we're going to have to put him down. Nearby, the pig listened closely to their conversation. The next day, they gave him the medicine and left. The pig approached the horse and said: - Be strong, my friend. Get up or else they're going to put you to sleep! On the second day, they gave him the medicine and left. The pig came back and said: - Come on buddy, get up or else you're going to die! Come on, I'll help you get up. Let's go! One, two, three... On the third day, they came to give him the medicine and the vet said: - Unfortunately, we're going to have to put him down tomorrow.Otherwise, the virus might spread and infect the other horses. After they left, the pig approached the horse and said: - Listen pal, it's now or never! Get up, come on! Have courage! Come on! Get up! Get up! That's it, slowly! Great! Come on, one, two, three... Good, good. Now faster, come on.... Fantastic! Run, run more! Yes! Yay! Yes! You did it, you're a champion!!! All of a sudden, the owner came back, saw the horse running in thefield and began shouting: - It's a miracle! My horse is cured. This deserves a party. Let's kill the pig! Points for reflection: - this often happens in the workplace. Nobody truly knows which employee actually deserves the merit of success, or who's actually contributing the necessary support to make thingshappen. LEARNING TO LIVE WITHOUT RECOGNITION IS A SKILL! If anyone ever tells you that your work is unprofessional, remember: amateurs built the Ark and professionals built the Titanic. DON'T LOOK TO BECOME A PERSON OF SUCCESS, LOOK INSTEAD TO BECOME A PERSON OF VALUE! |
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Only in America
Only in America... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in America... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
Only in America... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America... do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet Coke.
Only in America... do banks leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in America... do they leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America... do they use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won't miss a call from someone they didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in America... do they buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
Only in America... do they use the word "politics" to describe the process so well; "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures".
Only in America... do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering
Only in America... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
Only in America... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America... do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet Coke.
Only in America... do banks leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in America... do they leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America... do they use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won't miss a call from someone they didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in America... do they buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
Only in America... do they use the word "politics" to describe the process so well; "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures".
Only in America... do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering
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