Laurent Gbagbo getting arrested????

Do you have what it takes to be the next CEO?

The Next CEO

A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time to choose a successor to take over the business.

Instead of choosing one of his Directors or his children, he decided to do something different. He called all the young executives in his company together.
He said, 'It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO. I have decided to choose one of you.‘ The young executives were shocked, but the boss continued.
'I am going to give each one of you a SEED today - one very special SEED. I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you.

I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO.'
One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story. She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed.

Every day, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow.
Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew. Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing.

By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.

Six months went by -- still nothing in Jim's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however. He just kept watering and fertilizing the soil - He so wanted the seed to grow.

A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection. Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened. Jim felt sick to his stomach, it was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he knew his wife was right. He took his empty pot to the board room.

When Jim arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful -- in all shapes and sizes. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed, a few felt sorry for him! When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives.
Jim just tried to hide in the back.

'My, what great plants, trees, and flowers you have grown,' said the CEO. 'Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!'

All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the Financial Director to bring him to the front. Jim was terrified.
He thought, 'The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!'
When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed - Jim told him the story.

The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, 'Behold your next Chief Executive Officer!
His name is Jim!' Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed.
'How could he be the new CEO?' the others said.
Then the CEO said, 'One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow.

All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it.
Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive Officer!'


Moral of the story?
•If you plant honesty, you will reap trust

* If you plant goodness, you will reap friends

* If you plant humility, you will reap greatness

* If you plant perseverance, you will reapcontentment

* If you plant consideration, you will reapperspective

* If you plant hard work, you will reap success

* If you plant forgiveness, you will reapreconciliation
* If you plant anger, you will reap resistance
* If you plant fear, you will reap failure
* If you plant rumours, you will reap confusion
* If you plant hatred, you will reap enemies
* If you plant lies, you will reap mistrust
* If you plant knowledge, you will reapconfidence

what are u planting??????

So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later.

'Whatever You Give To Life, Life Gives You Back‘. Live our CORE VALUES, and Reap the returns!


Be the difference you want to see in the world.


"You don't need thousands of reasons why you can't do what you want to do, you only need one reason why you can do it" ... "Don't count days, only make today count!"

Season's Text: "Ecclesiastes 9:10-11 !!!!"

International Union of Women

It is the second International Union of Women meeting. A Danish woman stands up and declares to the group, "After last year's meeting, I went home and took a stand against my husband, I told him I wasn't going to iron for him ever again. The first day went by and I couldn't see any change, the second day went by and still I couldn't see anything....but on the third day, I came home from work and my husband had done all the ironing, cleaning, and vacuuming."

The Danish woman receives a round of applause and a woman from Sweden stands up…

"Well, after last year's meeting, I told my husband that I would never cook for him again. The first day went by and I couldn't see any difference, the second day went by and I still couldn't see anything, but the third day, I came home from work and my husband had cooked me a lovely candlelit, romantic meal".

The Swedish woman accepts a round of applause as the woman from England stands up...

"Well, after last year's meeting I told my husband that I would no longer cook, clean, iron or wash for him. The first day went by and I couldn't see a change, the second day went by and I still couldn't see anything, and on the third day after the swelling had gone down I could just about see again."

The other way!

A young girl announced to her mother that she was in love and was going to marry a Greek sailor.

The mother was not happy with the idea of her daughter marrying a sailor, especially a Greek one. But she decided that since her daughter was in love, she would give her some motherly advice.

"If your husband wants you to have sex 'The Other Way,' don't do it!", the mother warned.

The daughter heeded her mother's advice for nearly a year. But one day, after a wild session of love making, curiosity got the best of her. The young woman asked her husband if they could have sex "The Other Way."

Her husband jumped out of bed and yelled, "What, and take a chance on having children?

She was so blond...

...she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate".

...she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

...she got stabbed in a shoot-out.

...she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DONT WALK".

...she thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.

...she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

...she sat on the TV and watched the couch.

...she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

...she tried to drown a fish.

...she thought a quarterback was a refund.

...she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

...if you gave her a penny for intelligence, you'd get change back.

...they had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade.

...she tripped over a cordless phone.

...she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

...at the bottom of the application where it says "sign here".. she put "Sagittarius".

...she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.

...it takes her two hours to watch '60 Minutes'.

...if she spoke her mind, she'd probably be speechless.

...she studied for a blood test ...and failed.

...she thought Boyz II Men was a daycare center.

...she thought Meow Mix was a record for cats.

...she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.

...she sold the car for gas money.

...when she saw the "NC-17" (under 17 not admitted), she went home and got 16 friends.

...when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

...she thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your phone bill.

...when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

...when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home.

Life before computers

Lukwago and Seya

I couldn't resist sharing this hilarious piece doing rounds online

The new Lord Mayor is sipping a cup of tea. His phone rings. He asks his twin daughter to pass it to him.

Phone: Riing riing
Lukwago: (picking it) Hello!
Seya: Yee Ssebo

Lukwago: Hello..Hello...I'm not getting you clearly.
Seya: Network is shaking heavily.
Lukwago: I can't hear you, sir.

Seya: Extend further if you are not hearing.
Lukwago: I can now hear you.
Seya: Congratulations.

Lukwago: Thank you. May I please know who I'm talking to?
Seya: The mayor.
Lukwago: Shya! Which mayor?

Seya: Of Kampala .
Lukwago: Unless you are a nightmare.
Seya: No, even during the day. This is Seya.

Lukwago: Sorry, I thought it was an imposter.
Seya: No, no, no, I never had posters this time.
Lukwago: I mean imposter. Someone who disguises himself as somebody else.

Seya: I don't know that one. I never saw his disgusting poster.
Lukwago: Anyway, so what's cooking?

Seya: Eh, Lukwago! You have a big nose. It's Biringanya. My wife is in the kitchen roasting it.
Lukwago: Haha... So, why did you call me?
Seya: I calling to tell you know that city council not easy.

Lukwago: What do you mean?
Seya: You have to be careless with the people.
Lukwago: I don't understand.

Seya: You have to care less about their deals. They are terrific.
Lukwago: I'm confused. What makes them terrific?

Seya: They terrify you with threatenings of death if you don't similar with their plans.
Lukwago: Don't worry; I will handle them my way.

Seya: You can't find them on your way. They stay in posho areas like Kololo, Naguru, etc.
Lukwago: Leave them to me. Sorry, I didn't come to visit you at Nakasero hospital when you were feared dead.

Seya: Yah, that was a serious terrible. They announced along the radio that I had died.
Lukwago: What exactly happened?

Seya: The degree of sugar had risen in the blood. The doctor admitted me and put me on bottles of water.
Lukwago: That was sad.

Seya: No, no. It was pressure. The doctor treated me and after two days, I was dispatched.
Lukwago: That's good to hear.

Seya: Anyway, I called to congratulation you for being elected and wish you good in your term of office.
Lukwago: Thank you. So, how do you desire to retire?

Seya: Stop discussing history. I left Desire a long time ago.

Just then, I heard a knock on the door. I jumped out of bed only to find the landlord with an eviction notice.

What a dream that was!